Lets make this an early one

This could possibly be the earliest that I'll be going to bed this week and its 1:30am.

I haven't been dedicating enough time to God as I should be. I haven't been praying. I used to always pray and talk to God before I went to sleep every night and the first thing when I woke up to ask Him to give me the strength to get through the day doing the right things, to stray away from sin, but I'm so tired these days that by the time I go to bed and start saying my prayers I've fallen asleep. How selfish that God only gets the dredges of me. I can only spare him a minute when I'm fighting off sleep and can hardly think to talk.

I'm ashamed of myself right now, but am trying really hard not to pity myself, because there's no reason to.

When I wake up of a morning, I've been springing up, rather than laying there for a bit and praying just to prevent falling asleep again and sleeping all day. I dont really have a place in this house where I can go and pray in peace, unless its in my bedroom, and when I'm in there for longer than 10 minutes I always get disturbed.

I guess I've just had a dodgy run for awhile (although most of my trip to Sydney was good) and I just need to get things together. Being in a rut is hard stuff.

Bahhh I've been staring at this screen for half an hour. Its now 2am. Ill finish this later.