Jesus I trust in you.

Certainly the past month has been a test of Faith to say the least.

I know that the Faith in my heart is so strong, but sometimes the dark thoughts cloud my ability to listen to anything but those negative emotions.

I am blessed that my Christian family, although small, is one of such strong faith, selflessness, and much-needed and sound advice.

I've had some news while I was away that I didn't really want to know. I don't like secrets and it's hard to deal with them when you've promised that you will never repeat it -- especially when it's negatively affecting someone that you love so dearly. I needed time to digest it, to comprehend it and to know how to deal with it.

Part of my daily fight with God has always been because I am a control freak. I like to find solutions to my problems, I have issues with sometimes letting go and realising that things are often beyond my control - that God has a plan for all of us and He will do what is right for Me. Rebelling against his wishes, and throwing tantrums when I don't get what I want only pulls me further away from Him.

I go through these motions a lot before eventually realizing that there's nothing to do accept pray.

So that's what I've been doing. I've been praying for comfort, clarity, peace at heart and healing for my family.



Eternal Father,
I offer You the body and blood, soul and divinity of your Dearly Beloved Son, Our Lord, Jesus Christ in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.