I feel like blogspot has lost its sense of community. And I've lost my interest in posting here. I have a new journal at Live Journal, and I am happy to share it with anyone who wants the url, but I wont be posting it exclusively here. (And so no, it isnt the soakemsuper journal, I've locked every entry on that from the public)
If you want the url and can be bothered, just email me a request here; soakmesuper at gmail dot com.
I know I've done this before, but this is definitely final.
Jess
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
Friday, October 26, 2007
Talk about boring...
I always open this up feeling like I have some things to talk about and once it's open, I think ... meh. I have nothing interesting to talk about -- I really don't.
I'm sick again. I have had to take a week from my work placement. I will begin again on monday for the last week. Thankfully it wasn't a sickness that lasted more than a week, which I suppose is something very new and different for me.
Mum and I are going to a concert tomorrow night. It's the first thing I've been really excited about in awhile.
I ran over a cat on Sunday and I am still feeling relatively traumatised by that, especially since I had just made the comment earlier that morning about how much it would scare me to ever hurt an animal in my car. I don't think that I killed it. There was notihng I could have done -- it bolted out straight from the road and under my car. I slammed my brakes but it was still too late. I saw it out my rearview mirror bolting away in to someones yard like a rabbit. I guess I didn't hit it too hard, but I know I hit it. I pulled over and cried for 10 minutes and sobbed down the phone to my mum before composing myself. I then went to look for it, I couldn't find it so I knocked on some doors and finally just told this old couple what happened. They were lovely and helped me feel better about it all. They told me that they would alert their neighbours who own cats.
I haven't driven my car since. :( I feel sick just thinking about it.
Still haven't registered for WYD08. I still don't know how I feel about it.
I'm frustrated over a couple of relationships in my life. As much as I've prayed about it, nothing ever gets resolved and I can never establish my true feelings about it all. I go back and forth all the time.
Anyway, that's enough of that.
You'll hear from me soon.
I'm sick again. I have had to take a week from my work placement. I will begin again on monday for the last week. Thankfully it wasn't a sickness that lasted more than a week, which I suppose is something very new and different for me.
Mum and I are going to a concert tomorrow night. It's the first thing I've been really excited about in awhile.
I ran over a cat on Sunday and I am still feeling relatively traumatised by that, especially since I had just made the comment earlier that morning about how much it would scare me to ever hurt an animal in my car. I don't think that I killed it. There was notihng I could have done -- it bolted out straight from the road and under my car. I slammed my brakes but it was still too late. I saw it out my rearview mirror bolting away in to someones yard like a rabbit. I guess I didn't hit it too hard, but I know I hit it. I pulled over and cried for 10 minutes and sobbed down the phone to my mum before composing myself. I then went to look for it, I couldn't find it so I knocked on some doors and finally just told this old couple what happened. They were lovely and helped me feel better about it all. They told me that they would alert their neighbours who own cats.
I haven't driven my car since. :( I feel sick just thinking about it.
Still haven't registered for WYD08. I still don't know how I feel about it.
I'm frustrated over a couple of relationships in my life. As much as I've prayed about it, nothing ever gets resolved and I can never establish my true feelings about it all. I go back and forth all the time.
Anyway, that's enough of that.
You'll hear from me soon.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
World Youth Day
I went to a world youth day meeting tonight. Can I just say, my goodness.......... I have never felt so overwhelmed or as nervous about something in such a long time. Why? Why did I feel that way??
Is this for me?
Is this what I'm supposed to be doing?
Hmm... The whole thing... I felt so nervous talking to people I had never met, introducing myself to someone I had met once before thru another friend...
It was hard...
Why?
Is this for me?
Is this what I'm supposed to be doing?
Hmm... The whole thing... I felt so nervous talking to people I had never met, introducing myself to someone I had met once before thru another friend...
It was hard...
Why?
Monday, October 01, 2007
New placement
So I start the big job today.
Four week intensive, 7 hr shifts, 5 days a week. I'm quite excited and confident about it. There are a few reasons as to why.
The ladies that I will be working with are much older and more experienced than my regular part time position at another center.
It is no secret that I seem to level and feel much more comfortable with people who are middle aged and over. I don't know why, but I find it very easy to chat. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I've never really spent too much time with people around my own age, but rather adults and have always had to deal with adult situations -- but whatever it is, I am at ease and felt really confident and happy about the center that I've been placed in for the next month. I think and hope that it will be less structured and more relaxed than at my casual job.
It's so easy to immediately have favourites when working with children. I always get sucked in by the overly-affectionate, clingy children who follow my instructions and do as I say. In saying that, I have a soft spot for the children with behavior "problems" ... mostly because co-workers label them and make no time for them... I am always looking for a solution or a reason for their behavior.... There's a particular boy at my casual job that I fell in complete love with. He was so adorable ... but very whingey cos the other kids wouldn't play with him... but he was entirely lovely and affectionate. That's the best part about my job...
I love children....I really want to figure out what I can do after this course, what will be best for me.
Four week intensive, 7 hr shifts, 5 days a week. I'm quite excited and confident about it. There are a few reasons as to why.
The ladies that I will be working with are much older and more experienced than my regular part time position at another center.
It is no secret that I seem to level and feel much more comfortable with people who are middle aged and over. I don't know why, but I find it very easy to chat. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that I've never really spent too much time with people around my own age, but rather adults and have always had to deal with adult situations -- but whatever it is, I am at ease and felt really confident and happy about the center that I've been placed in for the next month. I think and hope that it will be less structured and more relaxed than at my casual job.
It's so easy to immediately have favourites when working with children. I always get sucked in by the overly-affectionate, clingy children who follow my instructions and do as I say. In saying that, I have a soft spot for the children with behavior "problems" ... mostly because co-workers label them and make no time for them... I am always looking for a solution or a reason for their behavior.... There's a particular boy at my casual job that I fell in complete love with. He was so adorable ... but very whingey cos the other kids wouldn't play with him... but he was entirely lovely and affectionate. That's the best part about my job...
I love children....I really want to figure out what I can do after this course, what will be best for me.
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